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Dear Crissy - Life, blogged.

Relishing moments of bliss

Moments of bliss? The word bliss is not one that has even been in my vocabulary for the past four long months. I have been stuck under the boulder of severe morning sickness for 18-weeks, and let me tell you, it has not been pretty. Not at all.

morning sickness

I do not want to devote one more paragraph during this pregnancy to talking about sickness, or vomiting, even though I know in the back of my mind that neither are truly gone, because this pregnancy? This pregnancy is hardcore. I’m talking serious hormones, people.

However, I have turned a corner. The black cloud of illness did not magically dissipate all at once, as it did in my first pregnancy, but there has been some significant progress which includes long periods during each day where I feel quite OK. There are even times when I feel good. Yes, even moments of bliss following a satisfying meal.

I can drink water now. This is a huge accomplishment in itself, and one that I appreciate with every sip.

It is absolutely amazing how much a person can take feeling normal for granted. Take a physical inventory right now, as you continue to sit in front of your computer to read this blog post. Breathe in, and out. How do you feel? While you may not feel like doing cartwheels in the street, if you’re lucky enough to feel just OK right now, you have so much to be thankful for.

I can’t help but think about all of the people in this world who are living through real pain, suffering, sickness and hunger. My constant nausea was even just a drop in the bucket compared to what so many are battling every day, and wow, what someone who is truly suffering would not give for just one day, or even one moment, of feeling average.

It is 3:21 AM as I write this blog post, and I am awake due to a mix of insomnia and mild nausea. I have officially hung up the fantasy of a pleasant pregnancy, and at this point really just pray for a healthy baby and a safe delivery.

As for moments of bliss? They are fleeting, but do come, and I am just really grateful for that.

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10 Comments

  1. July 27, 2011 @ 4:54 am

    Makes me appreciate my relatively easy pregnancies even more. That said, I had really rough times for the first year after birth because I have easy pregnancies and difficult children. Life is about relative.

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  2. July 27, 2011 @ 9:07 am

    Ugh. I remember that feeling. I hope you feel better soon!

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  3. July 27, 2011 @ 10:05 am

    Oh gosh…I feel for you….I sure hope that the feelings of, to put it bluntly, garbage…will go away for you really soon!!! I can feel your pain…although this time around I did not experience a whole lot of nausea and morning sickness…I am at a point now where I am TIRED…Tired of being pregnant, tired of feeling “fat”, tired of braxton hicks contractions (coupled with the real deal there for a few days…I was so dehydrated I was in premature labor….I too don’t have a real love of water these days) I am just tired…ready for this all to be over….ready to meet our princess….Just wanted you to know that you are not alone!!! I sure hope things will turn around for you :D

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  4. July 27, 2011 @ 10:32 am

    To bad that we have to get sick or feel bad to appreciate our amazing bodies, right? I just started working out again and it’s such a blessing to feel my muscles like I haven’t in a long time. I’m sore, but it’s a good sore.

    Only one thing has to happen, like spraining a foot, and you quickly realize how important it is to stay healthy, especially as a mom. We just can’t get sick really or everything falls apart. :)

    I’m so glad you are feeling a bit better. Hopefully you get to really enjoy the rest of the pregnancy — I felt like a million bucks at the end of mine, I had so much energy and was in no hurry to have L appear. Loved it — once that awful nausea disappeared.

    Will you be at BlogHer? If so, we must meet!

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  5. July 27, 2011 @ 3:09 pm

    I think difficult pregnancies are like deliveries. They’re tough, you remember that they were tough, you just don’t ‘feel’ the pain anymore. Just the joy in seeing their milestones!

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  6. July 27, 2011 @ 4:50 pm

    I think you should have blue booties for a boy. My guess is a boy.

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  7. July 27, 2011 @ 11:58 pm
    Alicen

    Oh my goodness, this brings back so many memories of staring into my toilet. I remember this last time saying for sure I was done and if I ever think of getting pregnant again my husband was ordered to hit me over the head….and here I sit wanting a newborn in my arms again. It’s c-r-a-z-y how we forget!! Glad good moments are coming to you again…may they come more and more frequently!

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  8. July 29, 2011 @ 10:41 pm

    I never felt better until 18 weeks either, with all 4. Here’s to waking up tomorrow blissfully not sick ;)

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  9. August 1, 2011 @ 12:15 am

    Having a heightened appreciation for the good things in our lives is always a great thing because it means you will always view your glass as half full, a trait that can get you through some really hard tmes. All that said I really do hope you start to feel 100% very soon, you’ve been through the ringer here!

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  10. June 11, 2012 @ 11:45 pm
    Lynnette Watkins

    My moment of bliss is coming this fall. The last one is GOING to school !!!! I will get 3 whole hours of complete quiet. I have no idea what to do (besides cleaning the house). Maybe afternoon bubble baths or washing clothes without yelling and backing up fights. I cannot wait.

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