When I realize how few photos I’ve taken of Evan lately, I have an intense sensation of guilt that starts in my stomach, and rises up, eventually giving me a lump in my throat that just-nearly makes me want to cry.
So, why don’t I bust out my camera and take some pictures? Well, I’ve tried, but between his new toddler attitude (and speed, most of the pictures are justs an Evan-blur) and my constant business as of late, I’ve just been one huge #momfail when it comes to taking photos of my kid. My guilt is further compounded by the glaring fact that I make a living taking photos, so yeah, I feel pretty awful about it.
Evan turned 16-months-old a few days ago, and that alone has really amplified my feelings of regret for not taking more photos. It is so heartbreakingly painful to see your child grow so quickly. In the same breath, it is the most beautiful sight you will ever behold to watch them mature and learn new things. The emotions that come with motherhood are so complicated, and while I may not be articulating this as eloquently as I would like, I’m pretty sure that my mom-readers know where I’m coming from.
I am going to make every effort to be better about taking photos of Evan in the coming months, and if nothing else, at least capture some photos with my phone. I know, phone-photos are not ideal, but sometimes it’s the most convenient way for me to capture those fleeting moments, and ultimately, that’s the most important thing.